February 11, 2010

Everything I once was is now so far from my reach that it's impossible to rebuild.
I know I've not been enough but I've definitely tried to be something. A big part of my life has been about pleasing you and wanting you to see the good in me. You used to be able to see everything in me and now you're so far away that I'm constantly having to rely on myself to find you. Although, you always knew where I was, mentally and physically.
It seems as though now I've somewhat diverted my whole attention away from you because I felt that you betrayed me. In reality, I know you'd never do anything of the sort.
I've never needed you more than I do now; During these small moments when I feel that all my hope is gone and all my sanity could be lost.

All I want is for things to be like they were. Things were always involving you. Involving me making you happy.
Maybe that's been my problem all along. Am I this lost without you?
I think everyone has the same question.

"Though an host should encamp against me, my heart shall not fear: though war should rise against me, in this will I be confident."